I thought I was the problem. I thought I just needed to try harder when it comes to my narcissistic family. My mother had this way of making me believe that everything wrong in our relationship was because I was too much, or not enough. For years, I shrank myself into someone she might finally ... Read more
I wasn’t the kind of woman who yelled. I was the kind who explained. Who reasoned. Who cried when reason didn’t work and cried harder when silence did. I rewrote text messages a dozen times to sound “less harsh.” I practiced softness like survival. I wanted to be understood, not feared, and not hated. I ... Read more
You see the narcissist at work, charming the room while you sit there feeling dismissed, emotional, and unheard. They make eye contact, crack jokes, and offer compliments. People gravitate toward them. Meanwhile, you’re in the corner, trying to steady your breathing, wondering how someone so harmful in private can be so adored in public. You’ve ... Read more
For years, I accepted apologies from my narcissistic family that were actually full-on manipulation. I thought being forgiving made me good. Turns out, it just made me look like not a very smart person. “I’m sorry you feel that way.” “That wasn’t my intention.” “You’re too sensitive.” I nodded, smiled, and said, “It’s okay.” Even ... Read more
I didn’t become strong by tolerating less. I became strong by finally refusing more. There was a day I sat on my bathroom floor, knees pulled to my chest, staring at the tiles that had heard more of my truth than any person ever had. That day, something inside me snapped. Not loudly. Not in ... Read more
You block the narcissists, and unblock them two days later. You set a boundary and then explain why you needed it. Every move you make whispers to them: “I’m still here.” And they know exactly how to pounce. I know this story because it was mine. I thought being the bigger person meant leaving the ... Read more
You’re not crazy. You’re not weak. And you’re not alone. Narcissists didn’t just hurt you. They trained you to shrink around their chaos. They blurred the line between love and control, between family and fear. These weren’t misunderstandings. These were patterns, strategies designed to keep you off-balance. You apologized when you weren’t wrong. You carried ... Read more
When I finally cut my toxic family out of my life, I expected peace. I thought the hard part was over. The constant gaslighting, the manipulations, the emotional rollercoaster… gone. But what came next was even more confusing. I kept finding myself in the same cycles. I doubted myself in every decision. I felt anxious ... Read more
It usually starts with a phone call or a story passed down the grapevine. My mother, teary-eyed, sighing dramatically, telling everyone how I abandoned her. That she “gave me everything,” and now I’m just cold and ungrateful. The first time I heard it, I felt like I’d been punched in the chest. My stomach dropped. ... Read more
Some people inherit heirlooms. I inherited responsibility for everyone’s emotional mess. Since I can remember, I wasn’t just a daughter or a sister. I was the fixer. The peacemaker. The shock absorber. While others had space to fall apart, I was expected to hold it all together. Their pain? Handed to me, not with words, ... Read more
