7 Disturbing Weird Hobbies Narcissists Don’t Want You to Know They Enjoy

There is a specific kind of discomfort that creeps in when you realize someone close to you isn’t just difficult or controlling.

They are actively entertained by disrupting the lives around them, turning ordinary moments into opportunities for quiet domination.

What looks like curiosity or even concern on the surface often masks something far more unsettling underneath.

Because narcissists don’t experience hobbies the way emotionally healthy people do.

Where most people seek rest, creativity, or joy, narcissists seek leverage.

I remember the moment this clicked for me.

I watched my mother slowly open drawers that didn’t belong to her.

She didn’t move frantically or emotionally, but with a strange calm precision, as if this was a ritual she’d practiced many times before.

She wasn’t searching for anything specific, yet she seemed deeply satisfied by the act itself.

And it hit me that this wasn’t impulsive behavior but something intentional and oddly pleasurable for her.

Below are seven deeply disturbing “hobbies” narcissists quietly engage in, because control and sabotage feel like entertainment to them.

7 Disturbing Hobbies Narcissists Don’t Want You to Know About

1. Spying on the People Around Them

For narcissists, surveillance is not occasional curiosity but a daily activity disguised as concern.

They monitor conversations, movements, habits, and emotional reactions with the intensity of someone gathering intelligence.

They listen through doors, read facial expressions for weakness, and file away details they can later weaponize.

They do this because knowing more than you gives them a psychological advantage.

I experienced this one afternoon while reorganizing a storage cabinet in my parents’ garage, quietly humming to myself.

I later realized my toxic brother had been standing just out of sight behind the door for several minutes.

He was listening to my private frustrations and repeated them word for word to my narcissistic mom in a completely different context.

The precision of what he repeated told me this wasn’t a coincidence, but a practiced behavior he treated like sport.

What disturbed me most was that he waited patiently, as if timing mattered, as if information lost value if gathered too early or too late.

That was the moment I understood that for him, awareness wasn’t about connection but about leverage.

This habit is driven by insecurity rather than interest.

Because narcissists fear what they cannot see, hear, or control, and spying reassures them that nothing exists beyond their reach.

2. Collecting Trophies From Old Relationships

Narcissists rarely let go of people emotionally, even when relationships are long over.

They instead hoard gifts and personal items like trophies that prove their past influence and desirability.

These objects are tools they revisit to rewrite history in their favor whenever they feel threatened.

I once helped my manipulative sister move boxes from her apartment storage unit and noticed she carefully separated items into piles.

One pile was labeled “important” and included birthday cards, old notes, and photographs from people she claimed were irrelevant and insignificant.

The care with which she handled these items contrasted sharply with how she spoke about the people attached to them.

This revealed that her attachment wasn’t emotional but strategic.

What stood out to me was how she paused before sealing the box.

She flipped through the items slowly, as if revisiting proof that she had once been central in someone else’s world.

There was no warmth in her expression, only calculation, like someone inventorying assets rather than memories.

This hobby allows narcissists to reassure themselves that they are always in possession of emotional leverage, even when others have moved on.

3. Creating Fake Online Profiles

The digital world offers narcissists endless opportunities to observe without accountability.

And many secretly maintain burner accounts to stalk, bait, provoke, or monitor people within their orbit.

These profiles are not impulsive creations but carefully curated tools designed to gather information while remaining invisible.

I discovered this accidentally while helping my toxic mother troubleshoot her phone settings late one evening.

Notifications popped up from accounts she insisted weren’t hers, all following the same people she obsessively criticized offline.

Watching her dismiss it with irritation rather than embarrassment made it clear this was something she felt entitled to.

What unsettled me most was how quickly she navigated between identities.

She switched screens with practiced ease, as if managing multiple versions of herself was second nature.

There was no hesitation, no fear of being caught, only annoyance that her access had been momentarily interrupted.

The thrill comes from omniscience, because seeing without being seen reinforces their sense of power and superiority.

4. Intentionally Disorganizing the House

What appears as messiness or forgetfulness is often deliberate sabotage.

Narcissists disrupt shared spaces to provoke frustration, confusion, and emotional reactions.

Clean surfaces, orderly systems, and calm environments threaten them because peace limits their influence.

So they create chaos under the guise of carelessness.

I remember spending an entire afternoon meticulously organizing a shared workspace.

The next morning, I found items subtly displaced and papers shuffled just enough to create inconvenience.

My narcissistic parent calmly watched me search for things she knew exactly where she’d moved.

Her expression wasn’t defensive but entertained.

What struck me was how precise the disruption was. It was calculated to slow me down without leaving obvious evidence.

This becomes a hobby of chaos.

Disorder serves as a reminder that nothing remains untouched by their presence.

5. Cyberstalking Exes They Claim Are “Irrelevant”

Narcissists often dismiss past relationships verbally while privately tracking every detail of those individuals’ lives.

They would obsessively monitor achievements and keep tabs on their ex’s new relationship.

This fixation isn’t about longing but about control, because knowing what an ex is doing allows them to measure their own relevance.

I saw this pattern when my sister casually referenced details about someone she insisted she hadn’t thought about in years.

Yet she could recount their recent travels, career changes, and social circle shifts with alarming accuracy.

The contradiction was too consistent to ignore.

It was unsettling how effortlessly the information surfaced, ready to be deployed whenever comparison or competition was needed.

There was no emotional tone attached, only assessment, as though she were monitoring a rival rather than remembering a person.

This toxic behavior stems from their fear of losing emotional ownership over former sources of validation.

6. Reading Other People’s Private Messages

Entitlement defines this hobby.

Narcissists justify snooping through phones, emails, and private conversations by convincing themselves they deserve access.

Privacy feels offensive to them because it suggests autonomy they cannot tolerate.

I experienced this when my self-absorbed brother casually referenced a private message I’d never shared.

He spoke with the confidence of someone who believed boundaries didn’t apply to him.

The violation wasn’t emotional. It was casual, normalized, and chilling.

What struck me was how he treated it as normal behavior.

He offered no explanation or apology for accessing my private thoughts, while framing my discomfort as an overreaction.

There was an implied expectation that I would adjust, minimize, and move on.

This habit feeds their illusion of superiority and ownership over others’ inner worlds.

7. Sabotaging the Success of Others

Narcissists subtly derail progress, spread doubt, or create obstacles whenever someone close to them begins to thrive.

Your success threatens their fragile self-image, so they turn interference into entertainment.

One time, I received good news about a professional milestone. I watched my jealous sister immediately invent crises.

She redirected attention back to herself, effectively draining the joy from the moment without overtly opposing it.

What struck me afterward was how quickly the focus shifted from my accomplishment to managing her discomfort.

There was no celebration, only containment, as though allowing me to feel proud would diminish her.

Envy and terror of being overshadowed drive this behavior, making sabotage feel necessary for survival.

What These “Hobbies” Reveal About a Narcissist’s Inner World

These behaviors reveal far more about the narcissist than the people they target.

They expose a psychological landscape shaped by fear, insecurity, and emotional immaturity.

None of these actions is accidental or isolated, because patterns this consistent indicate intention, not coincidence.

Being close to someone who treats spying and disruption like hobbies is psychologically dangerous.

It slowly erodes trust, confidence, and your sense of safety.

Their Weird Hobbies Aren’t Harmless

These behaviors are warning signs that someone derives satisfaction from violating boundaries and destabilizing others.

The relief you feel when you step back, create distance, or go low or no contact isn’t weakness.

It’s your nervous system recognizing safety again.

Reclaiming peace means refusing to explain your need for privacy and refusing to feel guilty for choosing stability over dysfunction.

Boundaries are protection.

They remain the most effective antidote to someone who treats your life like their personal playground.

When you stop participating in their games, their hobbies lose their audience, and that is where your real power begins.