“You weren’t born to be liked by everyone. You were born to be real.” And being real in a narcissistic family system? That’s basically a betrayal punishable by emotional exile, passive-aggressive group chats, and being cropped out of family photos so poorly you can still see half your elbow. I used to play the role … Read more
Gaslighting doesn’t always sound like an insult Sometimes it sounds like concern: “You’re imagining things.”, “You’re just too sensitive,” or “You always twist things.” And just like that, you’re the one apologizing. I used to leave conversations with my narcissistic family, feeling like I lost a fight I didn’t know I was in. What a … Read more
I want you to picture this: the narcissist sits like royalty at the head of the table, calm, admired, untouchable. Around them is a handpicked circle who praise them, protect them, and clean up every mess they make. They laugh at cruel jokes. They echo twisted stories. They make lies sound like truth. And you? … Read more
I didn’t go to therapy to forgive my abusers. I went because I was tired of being taken advantage of and blamed for it. I remember sitting across from my therapist, arms folded, jaw tight, expecting him to talk about “healing the inner child” or “forgiveness.” Instead, he dropped a truth so sharp, I felt … Read more
For most of my adult life, I thought I was just overly sensitive because I’m an overthinker in nature. I’d brace for rejection and overthink every decision. I told myself I was anxious, cautious, and introverted. But it wasn’t just my wiring. Those fears had fingerprints on them. They weren’t random. They were rehearsed, repeated, … Read more
“I didn’t escape narcissistic abuse by raising my voice — I escaped by asking the one question no one’s supposed to ask in a toxic family.” It was a holiday. Chaos. Passive-aggression served with pie. My uncle made a “joke” at my expense, and everyone laughed like it was harmless, like it was normal. I … Read more
“Narcissists don’t lie by saying too little, they lie by saying exactly what you want to hear.” I used to fall for words. The right ones made me stay. The clever ones made me doubt myself. The charming ones made me forgive what I shouldn’t have. I thought I was smart, and I am, but … Read more
I thought I was the problem. I thought I just needed to try harder when it comes to my narcissistic family. My mother had this way of making me believe that everything wrong in our relationship was because I was too much, or not enough. For years, I shrank myself into someone she might finally … Read more
You see the narcissist at work, charming the room while you sit there feeling dismissed, emotional, and unheard. They make eye contact, crack jokes, and offer compliments. People gravitate toward them. Meanwhile, you’re in the corner, trying to steady your breathing, wondering how someone so harmful in private can be so adored in public. You’ve … Read more
For years, I accepted apologies from my narcissistic family that were actually full-on manipulation. I thought being forgiving made me good. Turns out, it just made me look like not a very smart person. “I’m sorry you feel that way.” “That wasn’t my intention.” “You’re too sensitive.” I nodded, smiled, and said, “It’s okay.” Even … Read more
