Living with a narcissist is like being on an emotional rollercoaster, you’re constantly up, and down, and feeling like you’re about to be thrown off. If you’re still with one, you know how draining, confusing, and downright frustrating it can be.
Growing up, I faced a similar situation with my family. I was born in Cambodia and moved to Canada when I was 13, thinking life might get easier.
Instead, I found myself navigating a complex family dynamic where my mother, a charming yet self-centered figure, wielded influence that often left me feeling like the odd one out. My siblings, the “golden children,” followed in her footsteps, leaving me to figure things out on my own.
But I did figure it out, and now I’m here to share some hard-earned wisdom. Even in the midst of a narcissist’s manipulative games, there are things you can do to maintain your sanity, sense of self, and well-being. Think of it as your survival guide.
So, let’s get into the 12 essential strategies you must adopt when you’re still entangled with a narcissist.
Table of Contents
1. Make Yourself a Priority with Self-Care
People come and go, especially those who are narcissists. My sister and I were close until my success threatened her, and she turned on me faster than you could blink.
The takeaway? Make yourself a priority. Self-care is essential for your well-being, not an indulgence. Cut toxic people out or set aside time to engage in activities that bring you joy. Taking care of yourself is non-negotiable.
2. Do Your Best To Focus on The Present
I’ve learned from my family dynamics that nothing is permanent—not the good times, not the bad times, and definitely not the narcissistic drama. My mother held significant influence over the family, but eventually, I realized that her control only extended as far as I allowed it.
Focusing on the present moment helped me release her emotional grip. Instead of worrying about her next move, I directed my energy toward what I could manage—my thoughts, my actions, and my happiness.
3. Keep Moving and Boost Your Mood
Staying active has been a lifeline for me. When family drama escalates, I take a walk, head to the gym, or just dance in my living room. Physical movement clears your mind and lifts your spirits, helping you shake off negativity and regain control of your body and mind.
4. Prioritize Your Sleep
Compromising sleep was never an option for me. Growing up in a household filled with emotional turmoil, I often found myself lying awake, replaying the day’s events and worrying about the future.
Sleep, however, is the foundation of everything else. Without proper rest, it’s impossible to think clearly, let alone confront a narcissist. I made a commitment to myself to always get 7-8 hours of sleep, and it has made all the difference.
5. Maintain Your Mental Health Always!
Emotional manipulation takes a toll on your mental health. For years, I grappled with feelings of inadequacy, largely due to my mother’s constant belittling.
Over time, I realized that my mental health required consistent care. Therapy, meditation, and journaling became crucial practices for maintaining my well-being. Mental health isn’t about perfection, it’s about regular maintenance, much like caring for your car or home.
6. Nourish Your Body With Healthy Diets
What you put into your body is just as important as what you do with it. Growing up, I often turned to comfort food to cope with family stress. As I matured, I recognized that eating well was a vital form of self-care.
Nourishing your body with healthy foods doesn’t just benefit your physical health—it also supports your mental well-being.
7. Be Patient With Everything You Do
Breaking free from a narcissist’s grip is a slow process. It took me years to detach from my mother’s influence and even longer to heal emotionally.
Progress may feel slow, but every small step forward is significant. It’s important to be patient with yourself and recognize that change is a gradual journey, not a quick fix.
8. Celebrate Every Win, No Matter How Small
When I finally severed ties with my sister, it felt like a major victory. But even before that, I celebrated smaller milestones—standing up for myself, setting boundaries, and dedicating time to self-care.
Every small win is a step towards reclaiming your life. It’s easy to overlook these moments, but they are the building blocks of lasting change.
9. Guard Your Mindset Against Negativity
Narcissists excel at distorting reality, making you question your worth. For years, my mother convinced me that I was inadequate, but once I shifted my mindset, everything changed.
I understood that my thoughts shape my reality, so I began fiercely guarding them. Positive affirmations, supportive relationships, and practicing gratitude helped me reclaim my mind from her toxic influence.
10. Replenish Yourself First
Self-care isn’t just a trendy term, it’s a necessity. Dealing with narcissists can be incredibly draining as they continuously take without giving back.
I learned that you must fill your own cup first by engaging in activities you love, such as reading, taking a bath, or spending time alone. You can’t give to others when you’re running on empty, so prioritize taking care of yourself.
11. Stay Consistent With Everything You Do
Consistency is your greatest ally when dealing with a narcissist. Their world thrives on chaos and unpredictability, so maintaining a steady, consistent approach is essential.
Whether you’re enforcing boundaries or sticking to your self-care routine, consistency will help keep you grounded and resilient over time.
12. Self-Care Is Essential, Not Selfish
One of the most important lessons I’ve learned is that self-care is not a luxury, it’s essential. My mother often tried to convince me that focusing on myself was selfish, but I eventually realized it was necessary for my survival.
Self-care is how you protect yourself from their toxic influence and begin the healing process.
You’re a Priority!
Reclaiming your life from a narcissist’s grip isn’t about defeating them—it’s about empowering yourself. Their chaos may feel overwhelming, but with these 12 strategies, you can navigate their influence with clarity and confidence.
You’re far stronger than the stories they’ve spun about you, and each step you take toward self-care and self-love is a step toward freedom. The journey won’t be easy, but anything worth having rarely is.
So, stay consistent, celebrate your victories, and remember that you deserve a life filled with peace and happiness. The narcissist may try to dim your light, but with these tools, you’ll shine brighter than ever before. Keep pushing forward!